After Nv Wa created us, the water god and fire god got into a huge hissy fight. They fought from the sky to the ground, but the fire god won. The water god was such a sore loser that he hit his head on the mountain that kept the earth and sky apart. The mountain crumbled into itty bitty pieces and a chunk of the sky fell out. There was fire raging everywhere and flood water rushing out of the broken sky. Around this time, we were pretty miserable (as we should be) so Nv Wa decided that she should fix things up for her darling little creatures. She took super bright and colorful stones (I'm surprised she can find stones that aren't brown) and patched up the sky. Yay! Then she realized she needed something to keep the sky up, otherwise the same thing would happen. Wow. so she took a giant tortoise that somehow existed and plopped it down to hold up the sky. It worked! Somehow.
Once upon a time, there were 10 suns. They scorched the land until it burned, dried up all the water, and made us little chumps pretty miserable. Then, a hero named Hou Yi scrambled up a mountain, used his superpowers and shot down 9 of them. Very soon after, Hou Yi got married to this lovely person named Chang E. One day, Hou Yi went out to Kun Lun Shan to do Hou Yi things, and he saw Wang Mu Niang Niang. She gave Hou Yi two "super pills" (if you eat one super pill you get immortality, if you eat 2 super pills, you go ascend to heaven). Since he couldn't leave his wife behind, he told her to go hide the "super pills". Chang E then decided to hide the the pills in one of the nooks and crannies in the house. But who knew that one of Hou Yi's so-called acquaintances saw the "super pills". 3 days later,while Hou Yi was gone, his acquaintance came to take the pills! Chang E had no method of defending herself, so she quickly swallowed all the pills ...

Wait... so the tortoise is as big as a mountain???
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